Technology Is Not My Friend.

I choose to attribute this fact, and it is a fact, to the onset of old age. In just a few years I'll be able to get free coffee at McDonald's and I feel sure that this is why I have so much trouble with anything at all technological. Take this blog for instance. I have a number of friends who also have blogs. On their blog they have links to all of us who have blogs too. No less than THREE separate people have attempted to show me how to get their links on my blog page. Go back and look. Do YOU see anyone's links? Because *I* sure as hell don't.

For Mother's Day I asked for one of those Aero Garden things. I love flowers and fresh herbs, but I do NOT love to dig in the dirt, run across worms, or be outside in Florida during the growing season. I couldn't wait to set it up. I did the responsible thing and read over the directions before I started doing anything. I laid out all the parts. I felt OH so smug in the knowledge that when Mike and Rob came home I'd have it up and running. Right. I got to the last step. "Insert grow bulb into lamp hood. Do not twist bulbs." Done. Then I plugged it in.

BZZZZTTT, FLASH, BOOM. FIRE!!! Ooops. That doesn't seem quite right does it? One of the big, bright light bulbs appears to be flaming. Clearly THIS is not good.

I call the help line at Aero Garden and talk to a nice man named Nathan First question he asks me is "Is the fire out?" Let's see.... call the fire department or call to report the problem to Aero Garden.... let me think.... let me think....... "Yes Nathan. The fire is out." Nathan remarks on how calm I am for a woman who has just had a flaming Aero Garden in her dining room. Clearly he is not used to the level of disaster that surrounds me. The upshot is that I am to replace the hood (which either caused the bulb to ignite, or was ruined by the igniting bulb) and the two bulbs to them. He said Engineering would want to look at the scorched remains to see if they could figure out what caused the problem. I didn't attempt to explain the ongoing Me Versus Technology theme we have going here.

When the replacement parts arrived Rob happened to be home. He was quite firm about the fact that I'd better try this again while he was here in case of further disaster. Of course everything went just FINE that time. He tried really hard not to look smug. He did not entirely succeed.